by Diane Chandler

352 pages  |  B Format 129mm x 198mm  

Paperback Nov 2016  |  ISBN 9780995473522  | £7.99

Read an extract


A 2nd novel by the WINNER of The People's Book Prize for fiction 2016


How can you long for someone who doesn't exist?


Cat has always been in control of her life. Happily married to Dom, but flying high as a political lobbyist, she dismisses his desire to start a family ... until she herself is ready.

But what if it is then too late?
Complex and selfish, intelligent and open, if she is to succeed in having that elusive child, Cat must battle through gruelling fertility treatment and the emotional strain it places on her marriage. By her side, Dom, easygoing and ever the optimist, finds that he too risks being run ragged by their journey.
Both are forced to come to terms with their longing for a baby against the blitz on a relationship tested like never before...
IVF could create a baby but could it also destroy a marriage?
Bittersweet, at times funny, and always emotionally raw, this is by far the most moving and honest novel you'll ever read about IVF and its impact on a marriage.


Paperback, Waterstones £7.99 and to order from all good bookshops.

Paperback Amazon  £7.99

Kindle USA $5.99  Kindle UK £4.99


Ebook ISBN 9780995473539  


About the author


BRUZZ TV International film of Diane Chandler's Moondance event at Waterstones, Brussels in Oct 2017. Diane will be returning in 2018 for Waterstones' Book of the Month Club.

'This novel will stay with me forever. I really connected with it.' The Addiction of Books


'It was as if the author was inside my head and, as I read on, I felt this over and over again. It also reminded me how the enduring silence and stigma around infertility is crazy, given that millions of people have been through it and largely feel the same.' IVF expert Jessica Hepburn, author of The Pursuit of Motherhood book & blog.


'Rich with emotion this book also happens to be a very enjoyable read! Perceptive and touching.' Kara Myhill, Campaign Manager, Fertility Network UK


'A novel that will resonate with many fertility patients…much that will be familiar to anyone who has been through this themselves, especially in the way that treatment takes centre stage and comes to dominate everything else in life.' Kate Brian, Fertility Matters


'Definitely a book that someone who is starting fertility treatment, or is in the throes of, or indeed has been through and come out the other end with or without a child MUST pass on to their family and friends so that they understand what a hellish journey IVF is.' My Fertility Specialist Magazine


'An absorbing tale of romance, idealism, love, success, human frailty, vulnerability and imperfection... Chandler does not miss one twist or turn of the emotional rollercoaster that is an infertility journey.' Gerry McCluskey, BICA Journal of Fertility Counselling


'If comedy lifts fallible fools upwards to love and success then tragedy brings those on high crashing down. What better heroine to pit against the cruel and whimsical cycles of the moon? By the end I wept, though I won't tell you why.' S. E. Lynes, author of Valentina  


'An outstanding novel that completely bewitched me from start to finish. I enjoyed it so much that I plan to read it again.' The Book Magnet


'A wonderful read, truly written from the heart.' Have Books Will Read


'Intelligent, touching and mind opening.' Reviewed The Book


'A brutally honest account of what any couple could go through when faced with trying to conceive.' By The Letter Book Reviews


'Insightful, poignant and profoundly touching.' What Better Than Books


'A story that will stay with me for a long time to come and one I will no doubt talk about often.' Chat About Books